Sunday, April 24, 2011

Blast from the Past: Remembering "The Fast and the Furious" and "2 Fast 2 Furious"


As you all have marked on your calendars, this upcoming weekend will witness the release of the fifth installment of The Fast and the Furious Franchise.  But, before you watch that, let's remember what made the franchise so awesome in the first place (The Fast and the Furious).  And, also, what made it so horrible (2 Fast 2 Furious).  In order to prepare myself for the upcoming awesomeness, I re-watched the first two installments this past weekend.  Let's remember them together.

"I live my life a quarter-mile at a time," bespoke the Vin Diesel.  Words of wisdom and guidance overflow from The Fast and the Furious.  This was, of course, Diesel's breakthrough film.  The movie that turned him into a superstar.  It was only a matter of time.  Just look at the picture above.  He's staring at you.  Listen to his voice.  You are now aware of Vin Diesel's awesomeness.

Diesel was a lot of what made the first one great.  He yelled at people, acted tough, was cool, and even learned something in the end (I think).  Also, he drove sweet cars.  But there was more to the first one that just Diesel.  The whole atmosphere of early 2000 Los Angeles street racing was pretty awesome.  Ja Rule was also in this movie for some reason.  Moreover, let's not forget the breakthrough performance of Michelle Rodriguez, who would go on to play a tough girl who dies in many other films (see http://www.cracked.com/funny-6301-michelle-rodriguez/).

What made the first one so awesome was completely absent from 2 Fast 2 Furious.  First off, the name was retarded.  Second, there was no Diesel of Michelle Rodriguez or Los Angeles.  Instead, we got Paul Walker, Tyrese, and Cole Hauser.  Mother of God.  We also got a non-sensical plot taking place in Miami, the land where sequels are made (See, e.g., Bad Boys 2).

The first film is the defining film of your generation, whenever you were born.  The second one is a beautiful example of how shitty Paul Walker is at acting.  

There were also a couple of other Fast and Furious films after these two.  Tokyo Drift was pretty forgettable and didn't resemble the previous two films in any way.  Then, we had the blockbuster return of the franchise, along with Diesel, in Fast and Furious.  It looks like Fast Five will be close to the latter than the former.  But, with EVERY previous star of the franchise.  We have Diesel, Tyrese, Ludacris, Jordana Brewster, and even that Paul Walker guy.  Oh yeah, also The Rock adding further awesomeness.  Expect a review of that film forthcoming.

What are your thoughts on this amazing franchise?  Let's hear them folks!

22 comments:

  1. well that last one was so funny and commercial crap +followed

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  2. I think they're milking yet another decent franchise. I don't have high hopes for the 5th one.

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  3. Was never a fan of the the Fast and the Furious, tbh I felt like I was watching the same movie over and over >_<

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  4. I've never seen any of them. Not appealing at all. I have seen the movie where vin diesel is a navy seal and a nanny like 5 times though.

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  5. never watched any of the movies, not my cup of tea

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  6. Hi Satirical Swashbuckler,

    Do you need to add some inches? hah! These movies suck as much as much as you do.

    Love,

    Your boyfriend

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  7. You are hilarious. Well done, sir!

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  8. should watch these movies at first)

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  9. I've yet to watch any of these movies. Yeah.

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  10. weather or not that the new one will be any good, there is one thing that will be for certain: the tuna sucks

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  11. i watched all the movies, they are good for thier target market, story is always kinda weak but your watching for the cars.

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  12. Never a fan of them, entertaining movies but thats about it.

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  13. Don't really care for them. I will admit that I enjoyed the first one though.

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  14. the first couple movies were really good i have a feeling this one is gonna suck tho +1

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  15. when i saw the trailer for the 5th i couldnt believe it

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  16. cant believe they have like 80 of these already

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  17. They lost me in the previews or the first one when they said Ja Rule was in it. But you're a pretty funny guy. Check out muh blog.
    +followed

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  18. Been thinking about checking out the 5th one. Still not sure though.

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  19. No real plot for anyone watching that wasn't fussed over the cars...

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